Lets Stop The Pendulum - Diary - 21/08/08
Oh yesh~ continue from the previous blog "20/08/08 Latihan Wirajaya - But things were not the way I wanted it to be..."
"But things were not the way I wanted it to be..." Well, after handing over our equipment back to the camp, went back to our dome, and called dear dear (EX), dear was in the train going to Midvalley with dear's daughters and his kai ma... But heard that dear's voice like very unhappy got things disturbing dear...? Don't know no idea, must be I am the one who is thinking too much... Chat and chat, blah blah blah blah...
Alright got to go already time to say bye bye to dear dear... Normally before hanging up we will normally give each other a kiss, "MUACKS" but dear didn't give me that kiss and just close it... There's a weird feeling inside my heart and explain what is that feeling... I was extremely tired and all I think is that maybe it's that I am too exhausted so I just calm myself by not thinking too much about this matter... Trust dear dear, trust dear dear... Everything will be normal and OK like always...
Called dear dear at evening again to check up on him... Sounds OK already, and I told myself "see Chris everything fine and OK, you were thinking too much only so as putting more pressure on your self"... Felt relieve...
At 7 something called dear dear once again too check on dear dear if he has reached home already or not, well he was on the way home... But his friend's mom is fetching them from MV due to the over pack crowd at the train station... Ok got a little EMO because dear haven't reach home and it's already dinner time and spend almost whole day out already... Well get over it Chris...
At 8.35 p.m, things changed in a way that I didn't expected... Dear suggest that we end this relationship, he says his tired to continue this relationship already... Dear wants to end this now... I beg for a chance to fix things up, but dear doesn't want anymore... I have no choice but to respect his decision and his courage... Although I feel very sad about it, I cried after I hang up the phone... And all the memories of times that we were together emerge and penetrating my mind, heart is beating and bleeding...
